September 15, 2010
English Class
Wake Me Up When September Ends:
A Song About Summer
Does anyone ever think about school when summer starts, because I know when summer started I was never thinking about the beginning of school. When we were assigned this essay, I knew that "Wake Me Up When September Ends" by Green Day was the perfect song for this assignment. These are my thoughts about the end of summer and the beginning of school
(TS) The end of summer seemed to come so fast and it was so surprising when it came and I knew that "Wake Me Up When September Ends" by Green Day was the perfect song. (SD) In "Wake Me Up When September Ends" by Green Day the lead singer says, "Summer has come and passed." (CM1) To me this is like when we're in school it still seems like summer even though we're in school. (CM2) In addition, in this phrase it seems like to the person who wrote this song their summer went by way too fast. This is like my summer. (SD) Another phrase in this song is, "Wake me up when September ends." (CM1) This phrase to me reminds me of waking up every morning in the beginning of the school year, which is in September. (CM2) In addition, in September, we get back into the swing of things for all of our classes and at the end of September, this usually happens. (SD) Near the end of the song, there is the line, "Drenched in my pain again." (CM1) In the beginning of summer, we are usually drenched in memories of what happened last year over the summer. (CM2) Instead of being drenched in your painful memories, you are drenched in your happy ones at the beginning of the summer. (CS) Whenever I hear this song, it reminds me of the summers I have had before and that in turn reminds me of all my happy memories from past summers, but I also look forward to up coming summers.
Whenever school starts, I always start looking forward to things that are coming up. I would never look forward to the next summer because that is too far away. Instead I look forward to skiing or a school sport, but in the back of my mind I am still thinking about it.
1. I am still working on remembering all my commas and punctuation.
2. I really liked my topic paragraph because i felt i said everything I was thinking.
3. A weak point could be my concluding paragraph because I might not of wrapped up my essay
right.
4. A-
(TS) The end of summer seemed to come so fast and it was so surprising when it came and I knew that "Wake Me Up When September Ends" by Green Day was the perfect song. (SD) In "Wake Me Up When September Ends" by Green Day the lead singer says, "Summer has come and passed." (CM1) To me this is like when we're in school it still seems like summer even though we're in school. (CM2) In addition, in this phrase it seems like to the person who wrote this song their summer went by way too fast. This is like my summer. (SD) Another phrase in this song is, "Wake me up when September ends." (CM1) This phrase to me reminds me of waking up every morning in the beginning of the school year, which is in September. (CM2) In addition, in September, we get back into the swing of things for all of our classes and at the end of September, this usually happens. (SD) Near the end of the song, there is the line, "Drenched in my pain again." (CM1) In the beginning of summer, we are usually drenched in memories of what happened last year over the summer. (CM2) Instead of being drenched in your painful memories, you are drenched in your happy ones at the beginning of the summer. (CS) Whenever I hear this song, it reminds me of the summers I have had before and that in turn reminds me of all my happy memories from past summers, but I also look forward to up coming summers.
Whenever school starts, I always start looking forward to things that are coming up. I would never look forward to the next summer because that is too far away. Instead I look forward to skiing or a school sport, but in the back of my mind I am still thinking about it.
1. I am still working on remembering all my commas and punctuation.
2. I really liked my topic paragraph because i felt i said everything I was thinking.
3. A weak point could be my concluding paragraph because I might not of wrapped up my essay
right.
4. A-
Gaelen,
ReplyDeleteI love your song choice, and I think the song, “Wake me up when September Ends” goes great with the topic of your paragraph. However, when reading through your paragraph I noticed some grammatical errors. For example, you (TS) could use some more punctuation, because at the moment it is a bit of a run-on sentence. Also, I would recommend trying to re-read your writings in the future, for it helps with fixing all of the little mistakes. Over all, I thought your first paragraph was superb!
Gaelan,
ReplyDeleteI agree with andrew. your only mistake was the punctuation is your topic sentence. Perfect song for end of summer/beginning of school and you had great commentary!